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Doodling
Kurt sat in a brown chair in a common room, doodling in a notebook, smiling giddily, when he suddenly heard a voice behind him. "Uh . . . Kurt?" Blaine asked. Blushing furiously, the brunette panicked. "What? Nothing!" He closed the notebook quickly, knowing it was no use; Blaine had already seen what was written. Kurt looked up, and Blaine's facial expression was one of pure shock. Kurt contemplated running, but he knew he'd have to face Blaine eventually. He closed his eyes tight, hoping this would all just disappear, wishing he was simply dreaming. How could he go from feeling so happy, so giddy, so in love to feeling as if the world were crashing down on him? He just wanted the ground to swallow him up. Now everything would be ruined--things would be awkward between them and it was all Kurt's fault! He hated this stupid notebook. "Kurt? Hey, it's okay. Don't cry," Blaine was saying. What? Kurt came back down to Earth and realized his face was wet--he was, indeed, crying. Feeling pathetic, he wiped the tears away. "I'm so sorry." "What are you sorry for? There's no need to apologize . . . though I'm afraid we do have to talk,” the shorter boy said apologetically. "Don't we have Warblers' practice?" Kurt asked, sniffling. "Yeah . . ." he answered, "but this is more important. I don't think they'll notice." Kurt snorted. Of course they'd notice if Blaine wasn't there. Blaine laughed, "Okay, they probably will, but I don't care." "Coffee?" Kurt asked sheepishly. The subject was coming back around to him and that stupid drawing. Blaine gave him a small smile and replied, "Sure." Kurt let out a shaky breath, got up, and made to take Blaine's hand out of habit. He then shied away. He picked up his notebook and motioned for Blaine to follow. Kurt held the door open for him and they began to walk. "So . . ." Kurt started, breaking the awkward silence, "are you going to tell the Warblers you're not going?" "Nah. They'll figure out what to do without me." "More like cancel the meeting . . ." Kurt mumbled. He bumped into a figure as they turned the corner. It turned out to be Wes. "Blaine! Come on! We've been looking all over for you!" He looked at Kurt, seeming to notice him for the first time, despite having literally run into him just seconds ago. "Oh. Hi Kurt." "Hi, Wesley," Kurt snapped, irritated. He had better things to do than chat with someone who could barely remember he existed. Before Wes could respond, Blaine cut in. Kurt was not to be messed with when he was upset. "Wes . . . we can't come to practice today . . ." "WHAT? You're the one who organized this meeting in the first place! What about Jeremiah?" Kurt raised an eyebrow at this. Who in the '''world '''is Jeremiah? "We can reschedule the meeting," Blaine began. Wes cut him off, "What's so important, anyway?" Kurt glared at him. "None of your beeswax, Wesley." "Would you stop calling me that, already? And I was just asking." "Next time, just keep your mouth shut," Kurt said in a diva-like fashion. He then continued to walk down the hallway. "Come on, Blaine," he yelled behind him. Blaine shot an apologetic look to his confused friend before running to catch up to Kurt. They spent an awkward ride in Kurt's car listening to Kurt's iPod. As the chorus of "Defying Gravity" began, they pulled into the coffee shop. The two boys walked into the Lima Bean, suddenly craving coffee (surprise, surprise). It's just that even though Kurt suggested coffee, he wasn't actually thinking about what that meant--actually drinking coffee--it was more like he wanted to go to the place itself. Blaine and Kurt walked to the counter to order; Blaine ordered a medium drip for himself and a nonfat mocha for Kurt. "Blaine, you don't have to pay . . ." "Kurt, we have this argument every single time; you know I always win." Kurt replied, "Fine." As they sat at the table, Kurt became more aware of how real this actually was--he remembered exactly why they were here and not practicing a song for Blaine to sing, though he hadn't really forgotten. "So . . . Kurt . . ." Blaine said, unsure where to start. "What do you want me to say, Blaine? There's not much I can tell you that you don't already know . . ." Kurt said tiredly. Blaine took a sip of coffee and sighed. "I don't know . . . we need to talk . . . I just don't know exactly what about . . ." Kurt opened the notebook and turned to the very first page. He handed it to Blaine. "Here. Here are all the doodles and drawings . . ." Blaine flipped through the notebook; when he was finally done, there were only five or six pages left blank. Every other page was filled with doodles and things; the page he was on currently showed what he had caught Kurt drawing. His fingers absently traced the outline of the heart around their names. "Kurt . . . I . . . um . . ." Kurt suddenly exploded, "I can't take this! I-I like you Blaine. It's obvious, now that you've seen all the drawings . . . JUST TELL ME! I CAN'T TAKE IT! I CAN'T--CAN'T TAKE I-IT!" Kurt sobbed loudly. "Hey, hey calm down . . ." Blaine said soothingly. Kurt had started screaming somewhere along the way, and now they were the center of attention; literally everyone in the coffee shop was watching, trying to figure out what was going on. "Now, what exactly are you asking me to tell you?" "H-How do you . . . do you . . . do you feel the same way? If you don't, then . . . just tell me. I've been rejected before." Blaine said, "Don't talk about yourself that way, Kurt. You're a great guy, it's just . . . well that's the problem. I just don't want to ruin our friendship . . . I mean, what if we broke up--then things would just be awkward." Kurt laughed bitterly at that because things already would be awkward. "If you don't like me you can just say it. You don't need to cover it up." Blaine went to interrupt but Kurt wouldn't let him. "If that's the way you feel then why are we even having this conversation in the first place? What else is there to talk about?" "Kurt . . . can't we go on like we were? Can't we still be friends?" Kurt told him, "Okay . . ." sadly, because he knew that things would never be the same. They got up with their coffees and walked away together. "So, Blaine . . ." Kurt started. "Yeah?" "You never said whether you liked me back. I just told the guy I'm in love with the truth and he didn't even say anything back." Kurt turned to Blaine, who was gaping at him with wide eyes. "What? I didn't say anything new; I just told you everything inside the coffee sh--OH MY GAGA, I JUST USED THE L-WORD!" Blaine nodded slowly. "Um, okay . . ." Kurt said nervously, getting into the car. "Can we just pretend I didn't say that?" I guess we're just friends now, Kurt mused, I wonder if it'll still be awkward tomorrow . . . "Kurt," Blaine said when they were almost halfway there, "I think we're going to be alright. Our friendship, I mean," Blaine backtracked. "Yeah . . ." Kurt replied, starting to believe him, "I think we will."